Half of all marriages in America end in divorce. What’s odd is that when it comes to marriage, many couples spend exponentially more time, energy, and passion towards decorations and the look of a wedding than they do working on their own relationships. Am I stating that we shouldn’t plan for our weddings and only attend counseling? No I’m not. But what I am saying is that there are some key areas in our lives that we should address during engagement that shouldn’t be overlooked.
What are your spouses’ goals? Do they want to start their own business? Do they want to be a stay at home mom? Do they want to travel the world? There are many little things that couples can disagree upon and it wouldn’t be the end of a relationship. But there are a few key things in marriage that we have to agree upon to make for a healthy marriage. What are the big things in life that your spouse wants to accomplish and how can you two work together to accomplish each other’s big goals.
How are you and your spouse going to communicate in your day-to-day lives? Are you going to make time before or after work to listen to each other’s days and share victories and frustrations? Many marriages crumble in silence. When communication begins to wane affection follows suit. Are you going to have a date night once a week to talk about each other and not work or kids? Are you opening up communication during work breaks? Establishing a strong plan for communication will pave the way for a healthy and vibrant relationship where each person isn’t isolated but each person is heard and cared for.
Did you know that your spouse is not perfect? Sure you might know this in your head but do you believe it in your heart? How are you going to deal with the struggles and issues that arise? Are you going to deal with it in the heat of the moment? Are you going to take a step back and collect yourself before you argue? Every couple has to know that problems are going to constantly arise. Your battle plans for these conflicts will help you argue in a healthy way. Talk to your spouse about arguments and the rules for arguing. Maybe there are trigger words that you two never use like “divorce”, or “you always…”. Maybe you’ll lay rules down like don’t yell in the heat of the moment. There are not very many wrong ways to argue but you have to have a plan.
Marriage is tough. Marriage is not the flowery picture perfect story that love movies portray them out to be. Marriage will take discipline, steadfast love, and great grace for one another in order for marriage to work. A lot of women’s issues in marriage and life stem from insecurity issues. A great way to resolve some of these issues would be to purchase a top of the line home security system. I found a company called Smith Monitoring that offers some of the absolute best features available. Smith home security offers an app that can be downloaded to your smart phone that can control your thermostat, light, alarm system, and major appliances.
About the Guest Author:
About The Author: Katie Melendez is a writer for Smith Monitoring. Katie is also a wife, youth mentor, and a health nut. Follow her blogs for all current trends on home, health, and family.